Avid Editor's Insights

Obama’s SOTU: Translated

Posted by doriangrey1 on January 29, 2010

Cross Posted from The Wilderness of Mirrors

This is the Wilderness of Mirrors translation of President Obama’s State of the Union address.

Shut up and sit down, you are too stupid to understand what is good for you. Bush was a terrible president, he did terrible thing to you and to America, I and I alone have the strength and courage to fix the damage that Bush has done.

You want my heath care program, you’re just to stupid to know it. The Republican Party has no idea’s and is doing nothing about the problems Bush left behind for me to clean up. They must do my bidding or I will hold them personally responsible for every thing that goes wrong in the future.

My own Democrat Party is acting like cowards and they need to stand up for my programs or suffer my terrible wrath. The Supreme Court of the United States is stupid, so I will now ridicule them in public for that stupidity.

We must become energy independent, we must drill for oil offshore, build nuclear power plants and invest in clean coal and alternative energy sources. Pay no attention to the mere fact that I have made it impossible to drill for oil in Alaska’s Bering Straits, which has been proven to have more oil than Saudi Arabia, forget that I have enabled environmental activists to prevent any nuclear power plants from ever being built or that I have promised to make clean coal plants to expensive for any company to build.

I have enacted a spending freeze on government spending, but only after I raised that spending over 30 percent, I only froze it so those damn Republicans couldn’t reduce it after they back the House and Senate in November.

I am not going to stop my Marxist coup of the American Government, I will not retreat on destroying our economy with Cap and Trade just because Anthropic Global Warming has been proven to be a fraud, and you are stupid if you accept the facts on global warming.

In summery, you peons are a bunch of easily deceived and manipulated imbeciles and I intend to do exactly what I want and to hell with you and your opinions, you elections mean nothing I am in control, now sit down and shut the fuck up and do as I tell you to do.

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